One of the things that I realized throughout my life especially today when I had a breakdown (that a whole other story) is that I stressed to much on what I am not doing instead on things that I have done. There are so many good things that I can be thankful on. There are much more people who have less than me and would love to have my life. Most of these people appreciate everything that they have. Why am I so special that I deserved to talk badly about myself and not appreciate all I have. When contemplating this I realized that social media plays a huge role in this for me. When I stroll down my feed, I see friends and complete strangers living their “perfect” lives, buying makeup products and “glowing up”. Then I wonder to myself why my life not like this and why can’t I “glow up”. Afterwards, I start judging who I am and hating myself and reflecting over my life and paying attention to everything that I failed at. But I realized I’m doing everything wrong. It not about what you are doing wrong but what can I improve and work towards it. You have to appreciate all the good that the Lord had given you. Try to focus on all of the positives that you have around you. So I am making a pledge that I, Shanti will all the days of her life will stay positive and appreciate every good thing that I have and I will take a break from social media at least once a week of each month.
What’s 9+10? 21. Remember that trend when everyone joke around, sharing memes to each other. Who would think that I’ll be 21. I mean I always expect it but never this soon. This is the age where I’m getting old now, haha. Do you ever wish to go back to the times when you was just a kid? I would tell myself to stay that age forever but life doesn’t work that way, sadly. Recently, I been trying to reconnect with GOD by joining bible study groups at my university. One of the things I been praying for is to love and be happy with myself. This is what the Lord have gave me for my birthday. I felt total peace on my birthday. Weeks before my birthday I have been frustrated, confused and not focused about everything relating with school. I been going into depressive moods, eating up everything that I can get my hands into, not wanting to go outside. I been praying to the Lord to just help me be able to get through it. I been talking to friends about my problem and they truly helped out a lot, they helped me to connect back with GOD to talk to him about my problems and let me tell you that I broke down. However, it was good to be able to talk to somebody, get everything out of my chest that needed to get out. When everything cleared up, I felt this burst of energy and motivation come through me. Another thing that also helped out was listening to gospel music, which helped me get in the mood. So I been keeping up all these things until the day of my birthday.
My birthday landed on a Tuesday so I still had classes to go to (I know bummer, right!). Now, my Tuesdays and Thursdays are my hour and half class but I ended up paying attention and I got through with both of my classes. After class I went downtown to head to the aquarium. Did you know that when it’s your birthday you can get in for free? So you already know that I had to take advantage of my day. Who wouldn’t? I remember walking to the doors of the aquarium, I had my music on and I was feeling happy. Before you walked inside you have to take a picture. I took this adorable picture with the little penguin that they had. Then as soon as you walked inside they had these purple flickering lights and you could see all the fishes on the side. Continuing down the hall, it led out into the big area where everything are section off from the food court, guest store, dolphins area, sharks area and much more. It looked like you was walking into Mall of America.I felt like a kid in a candy store, it was the best day ever! I almost ran around the entire place. I felt happy and at peace like I never did before. I know for a fact that I felt like this because GOD was standing next to me, making sure that today, my birthday, was perfect. Who can ask for anything more.